I will rattle this one off quickly before breakfast as I have plans for today. A vile comment landed in my box sometime during the night. It is one I have seen before, and as usual it went straight in the bin. No need to read it, it was pretty long, a glimpse at two or three words told me all I wanted to know. It was from a person with limited mental capacity, there's a lot of it about.
Yes, I know, the general consensus is delete and ignore, which I always do. One click of the mouse and it's gone, gone down the pan forever, just like you would do with a load of shit.
The reason I am bringing it up now, is that not everyone has a robust way of dealing with nasties as I do. The words used in these troll comments can be particularly upsetting and worrying for people who are not as gobby as me. They take it personally. Do not take it personally, the people who do this do not know you.
I can't stand bullying, and this is what it is. You can ignore bullies, they hate it, do that if it helps you. But fight back if that also helps you. I was bullied a lot when I was driving, I fought back, and I won. Nobody stopped me doing the job I loved. I beat the bullies.
There are a lot of good people in this world, but sadly the bullying mob is multiplying because of the internet. It's the herding mentality, people feel stronger in a group, more empowered to puke bile, it will always be.
There is a way that goodness can overcome evil, and I'm going to tell you what you can do. You dear reader are a valuable member of society, you do not have to put up with the shit thrown about, there, I've said shit twice, three times in fact. Don't get drawn into retaliating because it will do you more damage that it will the troll. If you don't mind a bit of a bun fight, go ahead and answer back, if it makes you feel better, I do sometimes.
Trolls hate it when you are a happy person, they want everyone to be as miserable as they are. Do not let it happen. Go about your daily business with a smile on your face. Smile when you look at the screen, smile when your fingers hit the keyboard.
Do one good deed every day, be helpful, be kind, make someone else smile. This is the perfect antidote to bullying. Leave bullies to stew in their own cesspit, they have the problems not you. Go forth with a smile on your face and a song in your heart.
Lots of love. ilona xxx
PS. There is a good chance at least one troll comment will appear in reply to this. My regular troll will not be able to stop themselves.
Shame we cant just isolate the trolls to their own blog , i suspect we all have the same ones
ReplyDeleteThat's a good idea. Go to the troll blog if you want to be trolled. They can troll each other.
DeleteHa ha, such a good idea - that really tickled me! I wonder what they would call themselves on their own blog?
DeleteGood advice Iona, it's so sad that people can not be happy for each other.
ReplyDeleteEnjoy the day the wind is so strong round here but at least the sun is out.
Hazel c uk
Any nasty comments I get now I leave just where they are, I think this probably confuses the troll, they don't know if they have offended you or not.
ReplyDeleteRise above these people, that's the answer.
I'm smiling right now Ilona while I'm writing this so you did some good today.
Briony
x
I think if they go back later and see that their troll comment is still visible they think yippee, I've won. If the troll comment is aimed at yourself then you can choose whether you are offended or not, whether you leave it there or remove it. If it is aimed at someone else, they don't have that choice.
DeleteI personally don't want that garbage littering my blog, that's why I have comment moderation on.
Bullies are everywhere. My daughter was bullied out of her job as was the new person who replaced her. She wasn't the 1st person to be bullied. He thinks because he's a millionaire he can get away with it. It will backfire one day.
ReplyDeleteCarolx
I think I must be lucky - dont seem to get trolls.
ReplyDeleteReally windy here today. If you do your walk in the right direction today you will be blown along by the wind!
ha ha love the way you say to deal with it, a load of shit! I've set up tracking on mine and took one of my blogs offline and on the other one the other day and sure enough, back again, the same area of the UK, and if anyone has tracking then I'm from Penistone :-) Jo
ReplyDeleteI have got extra tracking on my blog. It won't pinpoint the exact computer it was coming from because there are so many variables now. It gives me the country and area, so that helps narrow it down. To be honest I couldn't care less who is doing it. I have a great life, and they are very sad.
DeleteI seriously doubt you have a 'tracker' that allows you to pinpoint the area of a country someone comments from.
DeleteTold you there would be a troll comment, here it is. Doubt all you like, I get weekly reports emailed to me. I can go onto their web site and watch visitors come and go. It tells me where they are, how long they have been reading, and how many pages they have looked at. Some stay on for a few minutes to read the latest posts, some look back at older posts and are on for a while. I used to get a lot of viewings from a town in the South West of England. Interesting.
DeleteIlona, the nasties and trolls are the reason (or maybe I just tell myself they are) that I am not blogging. The vitriol I've read leaves me blinking with a "What the..?" Lordy. So, I love this post - I can just click, and delete. I have been bullied in my life (by a family member and by school mates) and fighting back only made me angry and resentful, walking away (like click and delete) allowed me to just move on to the good. Thank you, thank you, for this post!
ReplyDeleteThank you for your story. It takes a far braver person to walk away and distance themselves from the bully.
DeleteYou are always spreading happiness with your blog. Your creativity and stories often brighten my day. Thanks for all of the time you dedicate to your blog. I sure appreciate you!
ReplyDeleteThank you for reading, Ellen. x
DeleteWell said Iona. Bah Humbug to the trolls!
ReplyDeleteIlona, I misspelled your name in my previous comment. So sorry about that. I realized it right after clicking the "Publish" button.
ReplyDeleteThat's ok, it's often misspelt. I tell people I am not a Scottish island.
DeleteThey must be such miserable cowardly people. Well done for pushing on with a smile on your face. ��
ReplyDeleteThere are some very sad people in this world. They need help! Lol enjoy your day x
ReplyDeleteThey do need help. They are sad, lost souls, who are depriving themselves of what could be a fantastic life. Instead they are in a state of perpetual nervous tension as they search for their next victims.
DeleteDear Ilona, Thank you for this post and wise words. Bullying in any form needs to be eradicated. I'm glad that you're strong and able to see through these bullies. You spread joy and happiness through your blog and videos and I am blessed by them. You brighten my day. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteI’ve been watching the cruise couple quarantined in Japan hospital who vlog daily. He does a daily live feed and gets some ridiculous questions/comments said to him which he reads out. You can tell they get to him. I don’t vlog but I know I wouldn’t give those people the time of day.
ReplyDeleteIgnore ignore ignore :))
I've been bullied a lot and I now realise bullies like to attack as they are not happy inside themselves and they are possibly narcissists and crave attention.I avoid if possible or speak out or report x
ReplyDeleteThey must be out on day release and not taken their meds again Ilona.Im sure that when they are taken back to their padded cell and have got their straight jacket on they will relax a bit more.xx
ReplyDeleteWell said Ilona I am sure this will be helpful and supportive to anyone suffering any type of bullying.Sometimes just knowing there's kindness and understanding out there gives people the strength to deal with it.
ReplyDeleteGreat advice, I would wager that it ruins a troll's day when we ignore or delete their posts, at least I hope it does. Ilola I do so enjoy your posts, especially when you use words we don't normally use/hear in Texas. Gobby is a fun one that hits the nail on the head when describing me, love it!
ReplyDeleteI mean gobby in a nice way, like standing your ground, and not afraid of stating your case.
DeleteI agree - such a sad lot - truly pathetic. You deal with them in the best way possible by continuing on and spreading happiness to all your readers.
ReplyDeleteYes, I will fight them. They think they are doing me harm, but as my past record shows, if someone wants me gone, they are going to be waiting a long time.
DeleteIlona - Can't you block the trolls from future correspondence? I am sorry you had to even briefly view their contempt. Very sad person, imdeed.
ReplyDeleteNo way of blocking people individually. I can block Anonymous comments, but doing that will also block those who don't have gooooglie accounts, and who use the name option when posting a comment. It would put a blanket block on everyone in those two categories. Basically I have to take the shit to allow genuine anonymous commenters who add their name. To block would exclude a lot of people.
DeleteVery well said Ilona, ignoring these people or laughing at them is the only way. Being happy, of course, is another. I really enjoy your blogs and your lifestyle. Keep up the good work even in these very difficult times. Cheers from isolation in n.w. italy. Ro xxxx
ReplyDeleteThank you. I hope your enforced isolation is not too difficult for you.
DeleteI like this post :). Trolls are a waste of space, they'll never get their comments published on my blog. I'm often described as gobby too, not that I mind!
ReplyDeleteI enjoy reading your blog Ilona and love how you deal with these sad people
ReplyDeleteProud to be GOBBY!
ReplyDeleteGood advice! It can be hard not to take it personally, but with practice it gets much easier :)
ReplyDeleteLove your positive attitude and you're so right x Jane from Derby
ReplyDeleteHi, Ilona - I just want to say how much I love your posts, they're so encouraging, and you have a great attitude, You are so right in what you say about the bullies and the trolls - there seem to be so many of them about. Sad people. We seem to be living in scary times with this coronavvirus. Guessing that all any of us can do is take one day at a time. All the very best to you, Ilona xx
ReplyDeleteHi, Ilona, I've found it quite difficult to reach the point of being able to comment on your blog - so hope this gets accepted! Just want to say how much I love your posts, and you have such a positive outlook on life. Try to ignore the trolls (I've been trolled myself, on social media - and it can really hurt) - there seem to be a lot of them about. Sad people. We seem to be living in scary times with this virus. Guess all any of us can do is take one day at a time. Take care xx
ReplyDelete