Wednesday, 9 October 2013

Where there's a will............

Writing a will is quite complicated, a task that I wouldn't want to undertake with a DIY will bought from a stationers shop. There are will writing companies out there, but I am wary of how genuine their qualifications are. Seems to me that a solicitor is the best choice. I don't want to pay, so I am having a free one drawn up.

I've just gone through the old will I made ten years ago because it wants some serious updating. Quite honestly I had forgotten what I had put into it, and reading it again is like reading it for the first time. I am surprised how things have moved on and some of the people named are no longer part of my life. I've gone through it with a red marker pen, scrubbing out those who have drifted away. The friend I used to be very good friends with, who didn't invite me to her wedding. That hurt. The ex who has another partner. He dumped me, I was sad. The good friend who was very domineering. I didn't like the way she was always telling me what to do. I felt bullied. Thank goodness I still have one very good friend who has always been there for me, and always will be.    

Some of the charities have been given the red pen treatment, my feelings towards them have changed because of what I have found out about them in the last ten years. But it's difficult to make any informed choices about which charities to support, because the truth behind them often does not come out. I recently found out something about a local charity from an ex employee, which did not please me. I don't feel inclined to leave them anything now.

It's very difficult to work out who to leave things to, even with a small family such as mine. It must be horrendous for someone who has family complications. If I knew when I am going to die, I would have a date to work towards. Some of the people in my will might go before me, then I suppose their inheritance will be passed down to their next of kin.

If I had a dispatch date I could start giving it away before I go, that would give me great pleasure. I have always wished I could win a large sum of money, then give it away to those who need it. I would love to be the secret millionaire, like the programme on the tele. Imagine the surprised look on their faces as I handed over a cheque. Now I'm dreaming, back to this will mularky.

If I think about it, I am glad I haven't got a lot of money, imagine all the bickering that goes on after a will has been read and folks are miffed that they haven't got what they think they deserve. Money can bring out the worst in people.

I wish I didn't have to make this will, but I have to. With a bit of luck I will have got rid of most of it while I have still got my marbles. Having a good time is on my agenda.

I was going to see the solicitor tomorrow, but I've had to put it back a few days. An emergency came up, a friend got the call to go into hospital yesterday, and I am looking after his dog. A minor op, should be out soon. Short post, I'm off out tonight, giving a frugal/moneysaving/scrimping/meanqueen talk to a W I group. Donation for the pussycat rescue.
Toodle pip.

10 comments:

  1. Hi, you never cease to amaze me Ilona, I read your blog daily (tho I sometimes "store " them up for a couple of days so I can have a treat and read them one after the other!) Anyway the reason you never cease to amaze me is I always seem to read something that I catch myself nodding my head and muttering "yes" or "too right" and so on....this time it was about your will and how your priorities and wishes have changed over the last 10 years....it is true about some friends that you thought were so close and treat you in a way that hurts, I feel for you there as it has also happened to me, also I agree about charities, so difficult to choose. You have made me think about my will as I am also about 10 years out with my old one, thanks for the prompt! Oh and thanks for your lovely blog, I do enjoy your travels, not a part of the world I know very well so great to hear about it & see the pictures. I especially like your blogs about your life, must have been very interesting being a female lorry driver, you were a trail blazer! Kind regards, Shirley

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  2. Must dig out our wills to see if they need updating. Enjoy your talk tonight.
    Love from Mum
    xx

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  3. Yes, the charities, I too realised that not all the money you donate gets used for what you might think it does, a surprising amount of money donated to some charities goes to support the corporate structure and huge salaries of some of the people who administer it.
    Means I'm a bit wary of the bigger organisations.

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  4. Hello Ilona,
    We wrote ours when the children were very little. If I tell you I'm now a Grandma, you'll realise just how long ago!
    We came home & told my dear Mum & Dad that should we sadly go before them, we had left the children to them in the will!
    Mum said what an honour, but she sincerely hoped that wouldn't happen. My Dad agreed & gave a little laugh saying 'thanks Ang'. On a serious note these things have to be done. Thank for reminding me that we should look at it again.
    Best wishes,
    Angela

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  5. Talking about when you shuffle off reminded me of hearing on the radio about a watch you can buy that apparently counts down your life based on a few personal details....for me life is for living now and not worrying what may be around the next bend in the road!

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  6. You make a very valid point about checking your will. I have been meaning to do mine since I moved house last year but time just passes by and you never know what is round the corner. Thanks for the reminder x

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  7. I'm a bit confused. You are seeing a solicitor and getting a free will? That would be the first time I've heard of a solicitor preparing a free will. If that's the case, then good for you. Wills are very important and it is also good to revise and update them from time to time as you've noticed. Is there perhaps a young person or two in your family to whom you could leave whatever you have? If not, is there an animal shelter or such like that you could leave something to or a hospital that always need money for the new equipment to treat illnesses? Just some thoughts in case you need some ideas. Perhaps you've already thought of and discounted most of these.

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    Replies
    1. Hello Joyful. I think you have missed a previous post. I wrote about a scheme where you can get a free will drawn up by a solicitor.
      http://meanqueen-lifeaftermoney.blogspot.co.uk/2013/10/dont-leave-it-for-others-to-sort-out.html
      The solicitor is working with a number of charities to provide this service, one of which I am happy to include as a beneficiary.
      Yes, I have younger family members, and some other charities I can put in.

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  8. I have been putting off making a will for a couple of months now, but after reading this post, I will give it my utmost attention.
    I too wish I could be a secret millionaire, since I love seeing the look on people's faces as they receive an unexpected gift.
    Hope your friend's op goes well and he's back home in a jiffy.

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  9. A good wake up call Ilona, thank you.
    I agree with Shirley that you write about timely issues and give us food for thought, Much appreciated.
    Pam in TX

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