Feelings

 A comment from John's post yesterday. Funny men have feelings. 

Anonymous1:50 pm

One of the things I admire about you is that you never "go offline" when the posts or comments get tough!

Reading through his 125 comments to date, (some are supportive), confirms to me that I don't need people to pile onto my blog pulling my life apart. I don't want to deal with all the negativity, which some people seem to thrive on. 'Offline' suits me, dear Anonymous. 

John quotes that he doesn't want abusive comments from arseholes, but he still gets them. Some people say that they are just different opinions, but there are times when it's best to keep your opinions to yourself. Those that don't have blogs would do well to start one, then they can broadcast their different opinions to the whole world. 

I think that John's post is all about self reflection. He has said that as part of his course he has to go through the counselling process himself. His post partly fulfills that obligation. 

I will add my hurt feelings story here. 

I have always hated the fact that I couldn't see very well, first discovered when I was a child and couldn't see the hymn sheet hanging on the wall at the front of the class. My mother took me for an eye test, and National Health specs were issued. Oh how I hated wearing them, and tried many times to manage without. 

As a teenager, trying to look pretty and fashionable, always brought me to tears as I looked in the mirror. Those awful glasses got in the way. I felt inferior, that I wasn't as good as everyone else. 

My brother lost his temper with me one day as I was bemoaning the fact that I was ugly. He said, and I quote, 'You look bloody awful, why don't you do something about yourself and get some contact lenses'. It hurt to hear that, but it planted a seed. Could I do that, can I afford it. 

I went to the optician and had a trial, first with hard lenses because they were cheaper, then soft ones. I felt I could get along with them so decided to give it a try. 

They gave me the confidence that I needed. My brother was right, it was the kick up the arse that I needed. I never looked back. My confidence soared, it was like I had been reborn. Now I was the same as everyone else, I didn't have to look through bottom bottoms any longer. Now I was normal, now I could see. 

I wore them for many years, but eventually, as it happens with those of a certain age, I needed reading glasses for the small print. It seemed daft to carry glasses around with me and to keep getting them out of my bag when I needed to look at something close. By then I had come to terms with the fact I couldn't see without glasses, so I changed the contacts to varifocal specs. 

Must dash. Got to get off to Crafty Club. Toodle pip.   ilona 

Wild bird drop in cafe.

We woke up to snow this morning. The other day I scrounged some feather dusters from Barry's massive plant in his front garden. He doesn't particularly like them very much and will happily give me some. I take my secateurs to chop a few down. The stems are very thick. I spread them out in my garden, poking them down into thick bushes. They last ages even though they are not rooted into the ground. Sadly the weight of the snow has made them very droopy. I hope they spring back when the snow has gone and they have been wafting in the wind. 

After feeding the cats this morning, I prepared a feast for the birds. An old board, throw it down on the snow. On the menu was wild bird seed, bread, chopped up apple, a few grapes, dry cat food, and some scraps of wet cat food that was left over. 

Not forgetting two bowls of water. They came down for their breakfast, lunch, and dinner. 

That's the only time I went outside today. The wellies I bought a year ago are very useful. 

I had plenty to do inside. The kitchen had a deep clean, and I had to unpack my art and put it all away. 

Let's see what tomorrow brings. I might need the wellies again. 

Toodle pip.   ilona

A good time.

A good time was had by all at the Christmas Fair today. The school choir gave us a few Christmas songs, which was lovely. 

This was my corner pitch just inside the door. It was my job to click everybody in as they arrived. Everyone said how treacherous it was out there, and it was. The freezing cold weather brought icy roads and paths. It's amazing how everyone managed to get there. 

I stayed behind to help put all the tables and chairs back into the store room. 

I didn't go to Aldi last night, didn't feel like de frosting the car. I went tonight instead. Desperately needed some food. Still had to de frost the car though. I had a bigger trolley because I knew I wanted a bit more than I normally get. £122 spent. 

It's been snowing here, but it has stopped now. Let's see what tomorrow brings. I hope we don't get any more snow. 

Toodle pip.   ilona  
 

Can you afford it.

Start the day with making a video. My response to a comment on my channel. 

I've been busy sorting and pricing up my artworks for the Christmas fair tomorrow in the Village Hall. I haven't booked a stall, because I don't want to appear desperate for sales as I stand in one place hoping that someone comes along and shoves a few quid in my hand. Instead, I have volunteered to be the meet and greet person at the door as the visitors arrive. I will have a clicker and tot up how many cross the threshold. My pictures will be scattered behind me on the bookshelves and laid on the desk, and any other places I can put them on display. I will make no attempt to sell them. If someone shows an interest I will smile sweetly and say, all my own work. 

I need some shopping and considering whether to go now to Aldi. Surely no one will be going out now in this freezing fog. Maybe I will, maybe I won't, but I desperately need some food. 

Have a good weekend. Toodle pip.   ilona 

Walking and eating

A glimpse of a disappearing sunset, a peek at a hiding moon, and a scramble along a muddy track in the dark. If you want to see the last ten minutes of the walk I did on Tuesday, bring a torch, because you can't see much. Apologies for the fuzzyness. The automatic focus doesn't work very well in the dark. 😁😎😱 

Here we have a selection of meals I have eaten over the last week. Now I've forgotten whats in them, ha ha. Mushrooms, green lentils, noodles, onions. 

Fresh vegetables and tortellini. Brussels Sprouts, cauliflower, carrots.

More green lentils, more vegetables, courgette. Scramble an egg into it when it's almost done. 

A can't be bothered to cook day. From the freezer. Grilled hash browns, Quorn nuggets, potato wedges, and baked beans. 

Loverly tasty stew. Made yesterday. One portion last night, one portion for lunch today, and I will finish it off tonight. Carrots, Brussels sprouts, courgette, cauliflower, beans, and pasta twirls that are a year out of date. Herbs and spices, thickened with cheese sauce out of a packet. Danish Blue cheese added for flavour. 

I hope that has given you some ideas. Experiment with your ingredients, mix anything with anything. Trial and error. You never know, it may work. Cheerio. Toodle pip.   ilona