More Flamborough and a tale of two dogs

I didn't realise that Flamborough was such a popular place. Thank you for all your lovely comments, and don't forget to visit ChrisJ at http://www.flamblogger.blogspot.com/ She's a little bit obsessed, ha ha. Here are a few more pics for the Flam Fans.

Well, today has been completely different from yesterday weatherwise. It's been gloriously hot and sunny. Me and Henry and Rocky went for a long walk, it was lovely to see the two dogs getting on so well and having a great time. We had a picnic at the bench on the village green at Flixborough. They had some doggy meaty chunks, and I had some grapes.

Then Rocky disappeared into a field of Oil Seed Rape, and was gone for several minutes. He likes to chase pheasants but never catches any. When he eventually did come out he was a little bit wet.

Henry had a swim in a water logged ditch, but soon dried off in the sun. 'This smells interesting. Get off, I found it first.'

Twas a lovely day for a walk. Hope it was nice where you are.

A blustery day at Flamborough Head

I took far too many photo's as usual, I have managed to whittle it down to twentyfour. Yes, there were some correct guesses, clever peeps. I had a last minute ride out to Flamborough Head, on the east coast of Yorkshire. Now that the Humber Bridge tolls have been halved to £1.50 each way, I don't mind paying it quite so much. My sister and hubby are staying in their caravan up there, so I had a day with them. Saturday was rumoured to be the best day weatherwise so I thought I'd better grab the chance.

I arrived at the caravan park just in time to get the bus to Flamborough, a few miles away. My brother in law now has his bus pass, so my sister was the only one to have to pay the fare. She won't be getting her pass for a few years yet as she is four years younger than me, and the Government keep moving the goal posts.

It was very blustery when we got off the bus at North Landing, which is at the top of the bit jutting out to sea. We were well wrapped up against the elements, but even so it was still very wild and wet, and a bit chilly. There was a couple of short showers at first, but for most of the day, walking along the top of the cliff was like riding a fairground ride, with the wind whizzing past you at 90 miles an hour. It was a job to stand still enough to take any photo's. This is looking down into the bay at North Landing, first one side.....

then the other.

This is the slipway that goes down to the seashore.

We walked, or rather staggered along, past Breil Nook, Cradle Head, Stottle Bank, and Selwicks Bay. Some spectacular scenery.

Thousands of birds clinging to the side of the chalk cliffs. At one point the wind was whipping up the seaspray right over our heads and we got covered.

Aha, up ahead is the Lighthouse coming into view.

Photo opportunity, me and sis. I have my £1 charity shop bag with a pink strap and neon coloured hearts all over it.

After a welcome cup of coffee and a piece of apple pie, I decided to join a small group and have a short tour of the Lighthouse. £2.20 for pensioners. This is the way up.

This is what goes on in the glass dome at the top. Very difficult to get any good shots because you can't step back in the small space. The whole dome thing rotates, and the light from the bulbs beams out through the slatted glass. I'm not sure of the exact workings of it.

Some views of the surrounding area.

Now it's time to go down.

Then it was time to walk back along the cliff top to North Landing to get the bus. We had a bit of time to spare so while sis and BiL went to get a dring in the local hostelry, I took the opportunity to walk down the slipway to the seashore, for a few more pics.

It was good to get back to the caravan, which soon warmed up when the heating went on. They have all mod cons in this van, like a mini luxury flatlet. My sister produced a nice meaty meal for the two of them, I took my own mackeral fillets and spaghetti, and had it with some salad. Only a small glas of wine for me as I was driving back.

It was a lovely day out, even though it was wild and windy. Sometimes battling with the elements makes you more alive and blows the cobwebs off, ha ha.

A little teaser

Sorry no time to do a proper post today. I've had a day out and didn't get back till 10pm. Got lots of photo's to show, I'll post them tomorrow. Not telling you where I've been but will give a couple of clues, so you can have a guess. My journey took 1 hour 20 mins each way, and I went in my car. I've been up a lighthouse. No prizes, just a bit of fun. Catch you tomorrow. Toodle pip.

I love freebies

I wasn't happy with the bin yesterday, notice anything different? It didn't look right, only half finished, so I put a lining in it. That's 100% better.

I used a piece of black cotton fabric, a black sheet I bought from a charity shop to use for bag linings and such like. Now it's finished. I always say if I can't do a job properly then I don't want to do it at all.

I don't mind telling people about my frugal and simple lifestyle, and don't mind admitting that I like free stuff. People who know me know they can offer me things that they no longer want, and I am happy to take them if it's something that will be usefull to me.

Today a recieved a small packet from my friend down south. In it she sent me sixteen cups of coffee. That was very kind of her. I don't know where she got them from but I will find them very usefull.

So, don't be shy, and don't be embarrassed, let people know what a responsible person you are by recycling, reusing, and repurposing as much as you can. Then people will start offering you things they dont want.

Be proud, shout it from the rooftops that you wear second hand clothes, buy stuff from car boot sales, and put extra layers on instead of turning the heating up. We all have to do our bit for this planet. Toodle pip.

Bin a bit crafty

The weather has been terrible today, thunder storms and lots of rain, no point in going out anywhere. A good day to make something. Here we have the bottom bit from an electric shredder, the motor bit gave up the ghost and was chucked in the recycle skip at the council dump. So what can I do with this odd shaped plastic bucket?

First draw round the sides and bottom and make templates.

Then cut out the pieces in fabric, adding a bit for the seams. Sew it all together, and you have a posh waste paper bin for the office.

I was going to put a black fabric liner inside but decided I didn't need to. Instead I added an extra strip and stuck it down on the inside with some heavy duty double sided very sticky tape.

Repurposing I think they call it. Making something new out of something old.

There is light...........

Ok, here goes, I'll scrap the words what I writ yesterday, and start afresh, ha ha, if you can put up with my not so perfect waffle. The subject of the amazingly intelligent piece I was hoping to produce is, how do you pick up the pieces and carry on with your life after a relationship has broken up. The reason I decided to write about this subject is (a) I have had an email from someone who is in this situation, she asks the question, and (b) I have had loads of experience of relationships going wrong, and had to put it behind me and get on with it.

With some of the not so serious relationships, it was relatively easy to brush things to one side and carry on where I left off before I became involved with the person. Either they messed up or I messed up, it didn't really matter which, there probably wasn't much love lost on either side. So I just got over it and moved on.

The trouble is that relationships aren't always so casual, they can become quite involved. That thing called love can sometimes take over when you are least expecting it, and before you know it you have fallen head over heels. Common sense goes out of the window, and you are no longer in full control of your own destination. You are now emotionally attached to another human being.

In the beginning, the thrill of a new relationship adds excitement to your life, it's fun, and you want to be with this person every waking moment. As it moves through various stages you become used to each other, and feel comfortable in each others company, sometimes to the point of cutting yourself off from your friends. It is a big mistake to merge yourself into your partner and become one, you need to maintain your own personality, your own individuality, because sooner or later, you will be parted.

So, let's get back to the point in question, how do you survive when your heart is broken and your relationship has come to an end, for whatever reason. One of you will have to move out, so you are either alone in the place you both shared, or you have to find a new place to live.

I remember a particularly painfull break up which I had many years ago, and it was me that left him, I had to for my own sanity. He was a bully. I looked around for a new place to live, and viewed several bedsits. I could only afford one room on my small wages, and everytime I came away from a viewing I was in tears. I could imagine myself sinking into the depths of despair in my small box. As daft as it sounds, I wanted to go back to him, at least I wouldn't be alone. I didn't of course.

The answer came in an advert in the paper. A female wanted a flatmate, so I applied and moved in. I needed to do that because it meant I now had to keep up appearances, I had to stop myself from bursting into tears every few minutes. I had to make an effort to act and look normal, not a quivering whimpish wreck. It worked, I threw myself into work which kept my mind off things, and I had someone to talk to when I went home each day.

To give another example of how I coped after a relationship break up, it was about 15 years ago. Once again the boyfriend was a bully, even more so, he was a complete control freak. I finally realised I had to break off with him. I felt a terrible sense of failure, like I should have tried harder to make it work. How daft to feel like that when it wasn't my fault. I felt completely adrift at sea when it ended, all washed out.

The house I lived in was my house, he was to be a part of it, I had made it nice for both of us to share together. The first thing I did was to removed all the ornaments, photographs, pictures, and take it back down to the basic furniture. I didn't want any reminder that I had made it our house, it was now back to being my house. I had no relationship, no friends, and hardly knew anyone. So what did I do? I needed to rebuild a network around myself, I needed to get out and meet people, I needed some new friends.

I spotted an advert in the local paper, a new social group starting up, they were meeting in a pub. I rang the number and spoke to Penny (changed name), who invited me along. I used to be such an outgoing person before I got mixed up with the wrong 'un, he put a stop to all that. Now I had to start again and get my old self back. The people I met were lovely, so I kept going for a few weeks.

Eventually I recognised there was a need for something like a local singles club/introduction agency, because there must be a lot of single/seperated/divorced people who don't have a social life for various reasons. I decided to start a club. I advertised it in the paper, we had pub socials, bowling, meals out, rambling etc every week. A full programme of activities that people could join in with. It was a huge success, and certainly gave me a lot of friends, but also took my mind off my broken heart. I was able to build a new life for myself.

So, back to the start, and the person who emailed me with the question. I don't know the circumstances of your relationship breakdown, but I have a pretty good idea of how you feel. For whatever reason you are no longer half of a couple, you are a single person. Yes, by all means wallow in your own self pity for a while, that's normal. You need to get it out of your system, so have a damn good weep.

Please note that I can only talk generally here about this subject, I am in no way qualified to talk about long term mental health issues. If there is anyone who is struggling to get a grip, professional help may be more appropriate. All I can do is draw on my own experiences.

I have always had a strong will to survive, no matter what life throws at me. I get knocked down, I get back up again. In my heart of hearts, I know that I have every right to make a good life for myself. To be honest I have become a bit cynical about love, what is it anyway? I have experienced deep down true love, but it hasn't worked out for me, so now I am happy to love lots of people as friends, and not fall truly madly deeply again. Now, I will not give my all to a relationship, I keep a bit back for me. Me because I am a person in my own right, not the other half of someone else.

To the person who emailed me, take it one step at a time. Love yourself for who you are, the gorgeous lady who deserves the best in life. Look after yourself, you can and will get through it. All the best.         

When the words don't come, take a dog out

I've been trying to write something super intelligent today. It started off pretty much ok, my fingers were whizzing over the keyboard at 90 miles an hour, then I started chopping and changing it because it didn't flow very well. Then I walked away from it and did a bit in the garden, then I came back and had another go at it. Added a bit more and moved things around. Still not happy with it.

The trouble is I don't know enough big words, I get mixed up with the grammer, and and I get frustrated because my writing isn't making much sense. Anyway, the piece is not finished, so here is a picture of Rocky instead. He has been here quite a lot since I have been back. No one seems interested when I go to the house, no one comes out to speak to me, so I have started taking him for walks more often, then I bring him back here for a good feed. He is a smashing little dog.  

 I'll just go and check over that article again, and see if I can get it ready for tomorrow. Toodle pip.

Keeping a tight grip on finances

Oh dear, my right ear got sunburnt last week :o( It was feeling a bit sore, but I just ignored it. I didn't put any cream on it, now it's gone all crinkly, ha ha.

Today I paid a bill. I went to town, and posted it with a cheque into the banks internal post box. They provide envelopes for doing this, so you don't have to queue for the cashier.

I like paying my bills this way because it makes me feel I'm in control of my finances. I don't care if it's old fashioned, it's how I do it. The bill comes in the post, and I make a note of the date it has to be paid by. Then I make sure I pay it in plenty of time so as not to incurr any penalty charges. I tear off the payment slip and put it in the envelope, then I write on the bill the date it was paid.

This then goes into my file as a receipt, in case I have to query something.

I like to physically hand over the money, or a cheque, to pay for things. I don't like direct debits and keep them to a minimum, because it feels like people are helping themselves to my money. I know this is a bit daft, because I have given them permission, but if you have too many people dipping in and out of your bank account it is very easy to lose track of where your money is going.

It is also very easy to forget how many direct debits you have, and if there is a date mismatch between what goes in and what goes out, you could find yourself not having the funds to cover the payments, even if there might only be a few days difference. The banks are not very sympathetic when that happens, and will make a charge for it. I have never been charged anything by my bank because I keep a close watch on the balance. I have been on the brink of going into the red ocassionally, but have always managed to pull myself back up again.

So to be sure I don't make a mistake, my system is to check my bills, use a highlighter pen to mark the date they need to be paid by, and stick them on the front of my fridge with a magnet so I see them every day. That way they don't get missed. Then when I go to town to pay them, I make sure I have a few other jobs to do while I am there. This system works well for me.

I don't do internet banking because I am afraid that the details of my account could be hacked into. I don't trust the internet where money matters are concerned, and never shop online unless there is no other option.

So what did I have for my dinner tonight. I managed to get a few yellow sticker reduced items on Friday night. The fruit and veg lady is great at Tesco's she knows what I am looking for.

A big plate of steamed vegetables,  a chopped up onion and some mushrooms in a mild curry sauce,  delicious. My kind of dinner.

Toodle pip.